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Accidental Happiness archived in seven not so simple steps (NC-17) Print

Written by Suryallee

12 January 2012 | 17291 words

[ all pages ]

Tolkien and all of his works do not belong to me in any form or way, I never planned in the past to make money from this nor do I plan or want to do so in the future! This is just plain Fan-work, nothing more.

Type; continuation / Complete
Rating; NC 17
Summary; Faramir goes missing.
Pairings; Faramir / surprise character
Characters appearing in the story;, Too many to list
Genre; AU
Warnings, Slash! If this is not agreeing with you, please leave and read something else. This is AU! My grammar and stile since I am Native German and this has not been beta read! I suppose that my bad Humor deserves an extra warning, prepare to be confused!
Other; Please do not use my story without my permission given, thank you.
Notes: this was originally written a while back (2 Years), on a dare of my dear cousin Jenny. I fixed it up as well as my spellchecker and I could, but it is far from perfect I fear. I hope it doesn’t mar the story. She dared me back then, to write the most unusual Couple that I could come up with that had not been written down before in this genre…needless to say, that I had a real problem on my hands! Later she didn’t want it and took another one of my stories instead. And this one ended up inside my drawer for two years.

I now dedicate it to Iris from this site, since she was so nice and helped me out when I created a mess with accidentally creating an existing story again by accident.
I still do believe that I am the only one that came up with this one and are somewhat proud of it still that I managed it to find one. The story itself is a little silly; at least I do think so.
Anyways, I hope you like it, Iris!

Your grateful, Suryallee

Italics used:

Faramir’s thoughts
Amrod’s thoughts
Amras’ thoughts

Step one: Confuse the Valar…

“Pardon me… could you please repeat that once more, Namo? I think I did not hear you right.”

The dark haired Lord of Mandos just gave the Lord of the breath of Arda a glare that could have turned the milk sour and refused to repeat himself. He did know very well that the first Lord of the Valar had heard him just right.

Next to the a little befuddled Manwe Sulimo sat his wife with an equally confused look on her face. Actually, all of them looked rather bewildered at the newest news that the minder of the death had just told them in his usual calm voice.

“You heard me.”

Next to the throne, Orome shook his head in his bewilderment.

“Explain then at least, how it is possible to lose a fea by accident!”

“And that into a timeline it does not belong to, I might add!” The Lord of the waters in Arda, Ulmo added in equal bafflement.

Next to both Niena sat shell-shocked holding hands with Este while Lórien arched a brow at his brother. “Not to affront you, brother but they are right. How is that possible and to whom belongs the soul in the first place. Since I do not believe that this is a light case. You would not be here if it was that way…are I correct?”

The dark Vala nodded once. “It is not. He is the hidden son of Olorin and Finduilas that we speak about here.”

What?! How could that happen?!” Ulmo and Tulkas boomed together in perfect unison through the council room all had gathered in on Namo’s request. Manwe just cradled his head in his hands, his wife gulped and the rest of the mighty Powers of the West had equally bewildered reactions to that news.

“Namo,” Varda finally addressed the Lord of Mandos. “are you trying telling me that Niana’s servant, who is dear to us all, has lost the son, that we have so desperate tried to keep safe?” Namo shook his head. “Not exactly.” Was all he told her. She gave him a glare. “You are testing my patience, Namo! What exactly does it mean then?”

Namo appeared unruffled as usual. “Actually, for the first time since the creation, I don’t know either. He is not dead, and by all means he should be fine and never have crossed my realm to begin with but instead he is in coma right now and his fea gone to Eru only knows where.”

All looked at the grim Vala in shock.

Finally, Manwe stood and approached Namo who stood inside the ring. “I think you should tell us of all what you know so far, my brother.” The dark Vala nodded and began his report functionally and calm as ever.

“As far as I have found it out it seems there has been an accident that did lead to this unique mess, my Lord.” With that, a strange picture appeared above in the air that showed the others what had happened.

A few days before on Arda…

Faramir followed Merry and Pippin on silent feet around in the old store halls of the palace. In the late, the two had often snuck off in here and he wanted to know why. What he found out wasn’t so surprising to him at all. The two Hobbit’s had found the old chamber with the hidden items that the King and he had deemed too dangerous to be stored away in normal rooms and amused themselves with looking into the old Palantir.

“What do you two think that you ar…” At that moment, Pippin threw the cursed stone in the air in his shock of being caught and the glittering dark ball caught the attention of Faramir’s eyes. From one minute to the next, the man fell down and was out cold before he hit the ground.


The Valar watched the two hobbit’s hop frantically around for some seconds in shock before Merry took off to get help meanwhile a crying Pippin apologized to an unconscious Faramir all the time.

The picture in the air vanished.

“Since then he has been in coma. His fea shortly came to my halls, what surprised me since I had not awaited his arrival there in any way, ever. He was by no means supposed to die and come there, but to sail, as well you all know too. Later in life with Legolas and Gimli together when he knew whom he really is. Instead, he appeared suddenly in my halls and then he simply vanished while I approached him.

A new picture appeared above his head in the room.

“…What is that child doing here? He is not supposed to be here.” Namo was seen walking toward the confused looking Fea of the young human, half Maia that stood looking lost in his halls. Faramir had only one moment to recognize Namo for who he was before his surprised soul vanished again. He left a unusually surprised looking Vala of death behind.

The picture vanished once again.

“As you all can see this was even a shock to me.” He told them solemn. “I could not find out first to where he went, then he suddenly showed up on one of my wife’s old tapestries and that was that.”

At that, all looked around mystified at each other.

Ulmo finally found his voice back first. “In which one, Namo. Because, I have suddenly a very bad feeling about this all.”

The darker of the two mighty Vala nodded at that. “As you should. She wove that one around the time when Feanor and his Sons reached Arda. It shows the night of the burning of the Swanships to be exact.”

All fell silent.

Lórien finally voiced out what the most thought anyways. “I take it that this is the work of the One itself then, but why should he do this?”

Namo nodded calmly. “I think the same and know it not. The only thing I can say is, that it looks that we missed something in the past.”

With that, all fell silent again.

“Well then,” The Lord of the wind told them all. “let us see how we can fix this first class mess up again. He does not belong there and I doubt it that Eru intended for him to stay there like this forever.”

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2 Comment(s)

This was funny, light-hearted, and a definitely unseen pairing—or rather, trio. Again I like that your characterisation of elves isn’t the usual ‘perfect beings’, which makes them easier to relate to. I also think you did a wonderful job of explaining just how such a relationship came about. I liked any and all scenes showing Faramir interacting with his children now that they went from one to three, (I’m a fan of Faramir in a father role). I hope you’ll continue to share your works here. Cheers!

— LN Tora    Saturday 14 January 2012, 7:32    #

To dear LN Tora
Thank you! _
I honestly don’t like them act that otherworldly either. I somehow had always troubles to see them thus, the Silmarillion was the cause for this in my case.
Tolkien’s stile is undaubtfully genius, but the way he described them, the events and all well…they couldn’t have been this perfect ever with doing all the things described. At least not to me.
And I too like Faramir act in a parent role. ^^

— Suryallee    Sunday 15 January 2012, 23:05    #

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About the Author


I am a now 40 years old mother who likes to write and to draw in my rare free time, grins ruefully. I love Tolkien, especially the Silmarillion and Faramir of course^^
I was sick for the entire last year, my eyes are making troubles lately. there is not much more about me to write down I think, well besides that I live in Germany, in one of the most beautiful parts of my Country that is. At least in my humble opinion, I just happen to love the Forrest around my town^^!
Greetings back from Germany ___