Faramir Fiction Archive

If you can't see me as who I am, then why bother? (NC-17)

Written by Laivindur

22 April 2012 | 74699 words | Work in Progress

Chapter Fourteen

After Faramir had been starting to eat again, and was fit to walk all by himself, he had found his way to the hobby room one night, to ponder in the fire with a single glass of red wine to keep him company. He had tried playing some music on the several instruments, but his head could only think of the poor boy who’d sacrificed his life for him.
He had been talking to Boromir about it that day when he had stormed in to the houses of healing to look upon his depressed little brother, and Faramir had finally gotten to cry his heart out in his arms, but he just couldn’t stop thinking about Farahir, and of course the other horrific experiences in the dark cave between Ithilien and Ephel Duath.
Not only had his heart ached at the time Boromir had held him, but as he sobbed and heaved for breath he felt every wound on his body remind him of the evil. He would have been ashamed if his father had seen him so beaten down as he was, but then the sour sweet joy of not having him there at the time prevented such an embarrassment.

Days later, he now sat on the couch in the warm hobby room in his dark blue night trousers with a bandaged bare upper body. He shone by the warmth of the hearth and looked blunt in front of himself with the glass in his hand between the legs.
He had spent many nights sitting there with only one glass of the red liquor which he had picked up from the kitchen on his way, but this time when he looked upon it, he thought of the blood running out of the poor boy’s throat when cut open by the orc chief.
The thought made him sick, and after putting the glass away, he rested his head in his arms. He was too tired to think.

His wounds protested the slightest when he lifted his head abrupt by a sound from the door as it opened, and Denethor stepped carefully inside. Seeing his son sitting sad on the couch, and wearing only his trousers and the bandages covering his torso, he tried to smile.

The son tried to smile back, but tensed and shifted as his father sat by his side. He waited nervously for him to speak and hoped a conversation with compliments could be at bay as Denethor used more time to find words than usual, and the fact that he didn’t look upon him. Meanwhile Faramir prepared not to ruin this moment and tentatively Denethor started slowly.

“I have learned what happened in the cave, and by that you have gained honor, well done, son.”
Their eyes were locked to one another while the steward complimented his captain, but when Faramir did not let a single word come forth though his mouth opened for it and instead threw his gaze to the carpet while closing his soft lips, the father frowned and spoke with a hint of chill like a sneaky first winter cold.

“You seem troubled. I recognize that look.”
Faramir didn’t speak. He tried to freeze this moment where Denethor had actually looked at him and saw him; saw his grief.

“Tell me what is bothering you, Faramir.”
Faramir met Denethor’s worried, but still strict gaze to speak, and when Faramir quickly looked back at the red carpet to collect the right words, the father took the chance to look at Faramir’s wounds. Though Denethor’s metal face lingered, his heart ached by the torment his son had been through.

The steward got both surprised and not by what Faramir said; he explained what Farahir had done, and how his mother’s conditions were. That he had been her only son and that she deserved a better house and someone to look after her. He also hinted to a proposition he had spoken to his father about before; having some sort of care house for the poor and helpless people left alone by the cause of dead soldiers.

Denethor had not entered to his son knowing this was bothering him, though that was not all of his son’s worst worries, but the son would never speak to him about them, and Faramir had gotten to know his father more like the steward more like his own kin.

They had the same arguing as before only Denethor spoke calmer and softer taking his earlier intentions in mind
“Faramir, I came here for your healing and worries, not some old woman who knew her son was to die some day or another.”
“But I feel guilt. I feel some responsibility, and it is not hard to build her a better house and give her perhaps some coins to live for.”
“That soldier gained honor by serving Gondor, and his mother should be content by that. We cannot give coins and houses to every family member to our soldiers who dies.”
His voice got deeper
”Do not fail me by retreating to your weak and soft heart and rebel against me once more, Faramir. This discussion…I will have no more of it.”

Faramir’s wounds along with his heart winced. He stared still at the carpet with his crystal grey eyes, regretting he had mentioned his worries.
Denethor had completely forgotten his reason for meeting his son
“I thought I had prepared you, but I fear you’re just as naïve as…” Faramir broke his father’s words and met his eyes with provoke “Father, please!” the son had not cut off his father’s words for a long time. His eyes turned from anger to grief and fright.

“It is not my intent to fail you or disgrace you or humiliate you or whatever you accuse me off. I do what I can in this war, but that doesn’t mean I enjoy it. I don’t like war and slaughter, but I do it to protect the lands I love, and the people I love. And I do it for you, because believe it or not I do love you.”

Seeing Denethor’s unreadable face and having the feeling of fright growing bigger within, he looked back down at the carpet while wounds poked and pinched him as his blood hurried past them.

He didn’t dare to meet his father’s gaze, and it would always be a mystery to him how Denethor took it since he rose and left without a word.

After lingering in the hobby room with emotions of anger, grief and loneliness punishing him for the once in a year chance of actually having a nice conversation with his father, he decided a good night sleep was needed, but then he stopped right in front of the door and thought maybe he could be so lucky that Boromir had gotten off early from his duties and waited for him in his chamber.

He felt lighter in spirit as he walked with his injuries through the hallways to Boromir’s chamber.
He looked around in the white and black hallway with a few beaming candles light, to see if anyone saw him before slowly opening the door. No one could be seen inside, but he smiled and closed the door as noises of his brother were heard from his bath place.

Faramir walked soundlessly across the room and placed himself in the doorway to the bath, watching his brother’s great body behind the curtain. He was probably naked, and Faramir smiled as he watched him dress after the wash.

Boromir drew the curtain away to look and smiled as he spoke.
“I hoped it was you.”
After putting his dark green trousers on, and throwing away some dirty clothes for the servants to pick up, he walked to Faramir and gave him a gentle kiss on his brow.

“Have you spoken to father?”
Boromir didn’t need an answer seeing Faramir’s eyes drop and mouth tighten, and almost jumped when Faramir raised his gaze and spoke “He was proud of me…”
Hearing good news of their conversation made Boromir’s brows fly, but hearing the rest: “…but… you know.” they quickly fell.

Boromir looked reassuringly at him and caressed his cheek
“Don’t you worry; you are making progress, he only needs time to see it.”
Boromir closed in on Faramir with a brushing hand at his ear, and Faramir’s cheeks reddened while he lowered his face in a smile and tried shyly and effortlessly to hide in the corner of the door.

Boromir’s breath caressed Faramir’s other ear and neck, and while the older man pressed him to the door frame, both hearts pounded more fiercely as they thought more and more of each other.

Faramir placed his hands on his brother’s waists and caressed him slowly and curiously with his fingers at the back moving upwards, and his thumbs at the front downwards. The inexperienced lover’s hands ended up carefully on Boromir’s buttocks, and the soldier’s broad shoulders and strong muscles made the slimmer ranger lean surrendering to the frame.

Faramir’s breath quickened as the more experienced lover carefully touched his neck with his lips.
“Boromir.”
“Let me kiss you, Faramir. I will do nothing more. Just let me kiss you.”

Faramir let Boromir crave as much as he could of his neck, and as the neck had been explored thoroughly, he carefully went up to his cheek, but it was Faramir who cupped his brother’s head and pressed deeply into a wet and passionately kiss where both stumbled over to the bedside. Faramir placed his knee on it before letting them both fall onto it with the willingly ranger kissing passionately on top of the happy general.

Even though Boromir could sense Faramir’s small winces whenever a wound hurt of the movements, he didn’t move to end it, but when the slender man stopped, apparently he had lifted himself on to his knees to straddle his general, the wound from the stab in his thigh had struck him with a strong pain, and he stretched out the injured left leg still sitting on Boromir.
The older brother looked at his little one with awoken eyes as he watched him draw away from the kiss and sigh when the pain released its grasp at him.

Faramir looked apologetically at his brother underneath him, but he only smiled a smile of comfort while stroking the foot next to his head.

Faramir was fed up with being wounded
“I can’t wait until these injuries are healed. Then I can cuddle with you as much as I want without having them pester me.”

Boromir grinned at his little one, and stretched his long and strong arm to press Faramir’s cranky lip downwards with his finger and let the wet lip flopp back again. He repeated this three times, making Faramir smile more and more for each, and finally the little brother let out a cute and warm laughter.

Boromir laughed along and rose up so Faramir ended up on his lap straddling, leaving the injured leg behind both physically and literally.

Faramir straightened up and pressed his groin together with Boromir’s, making him kiss his younger brother carefully not to touch any of his wounds on his torso.
“I love you, Faramir. I love the way you have grown. You just keep getting more and more perfect. You are perfect.”

It was a bit difficult for Faramir to understand why his brother loved him so, but he could imagine he spoke the truth since he felt just the same for him.
Going in for another kiss, Boromir sled his right hand from Faramir’s waist where it had grasped firmly and pressed him harder to his groin when the little one had teased him, to underneath his trousers and cupped his left buttock. Faramir’s cheeks burned and he embraced Boromir’s neck while arching his back and pressing deeper onto the man’s groin while hot emotions of lust stirred the ranger.

The older brother breathed heavily by the thrilling reaction he himself got and by the astonishing creature on his lap. A slight foxy smile emerged while thinking of his next move, and with half closed eyes resting in the air he prepared for Faramir’s reaction; he wanted to perceive it all.

Boromir went for it, and Faramir clenched to his older brother in his jerk of surprise while letting out a soft whimper by the finger touching his entrance.

“It’s alright.”
Boromir whispered and shifted to gain more control and steady his arching captain. Faramir had closed his eyes in the surprise, but opened them slowly by Boromir’s comforting voice.

He kept the embrace and panted on to his brother’s shoulder while waiting for his next move. Boromir sensed the fear in Faramir and went on carefully. Another, but small, jerk from Faramir as he repeated the action made Boromir lean his head onto Faramir’s, and comfort him with more loving words.
Boromir knew he was not that very nice to his brother, stirring such emotions within him knowing he was not going any further, but couldn’t stop himself just yet.

Faramir pressed his head against Boromir’s and let his breath do chills from Boromir’s ear and down to his spine, and when the general sled his hand further down and caressed whatever would appear between Faramir’s legs, Faramir moaned and tightened his legs while shifting closer and further up on the strong lap.
Boromir smiled as he had to strain his neck to keep it up in Faramir’s buck battling sort of love.

The pain in Faramir’s thigh could scream as much as it wanted; he was not letting it ruin this wonderful touch of his brother. Boromir grinned as his little brother’s body moved impatiently for more, and the dark blue trousers became the sea brushing against the green grass in the night.
Boromir sled his hand slowly over Faramir’s behind with a finger taunting the entrance before his lovingly hand appeared out of his trousers and moving slowly back to the waist.

“Don’t stop, please don’t stop, Boromir.”
Faramir whispered and tried to make him do more while buck battling to the chuckling brother’s head, but as Boromir did nothing but keep his firm grasp at his waist, he looked at him with his grey pleading eyes.
The eyes stared at the entertained and sexy brother with love and lust, but they calmed their intensity as they understood he wasn’t going to get more. Even though, Faramir stroke his hand down his older brother’s neck to perhaps make him respond, but stopped at his collarbone.

Boromir’s darker grey eyes smiled at his sad and a little confused little brother, then he spoke
“I love to touch you, and I love how you react to my touches, and I love you, and I lo… Ah, gods I could go on for ages, but I dare not cause too much on your body, dear Faramir. Your wounds are deep and many…”
Boromir kept on despite Faramir’s head shaking objections and sad eyes.
“…I do not want to cause you pain or delays of healing.”

Faramir played his fingers at Boromir’s collarbone while his sad but understanding gaze lowered.
“I am sorry I made you think otherwise, brother.”
Faramir smiled and glanced at him

“No, it is alright. I’m glad you…” A shy shift of Faramir made Boromir smile “…did what you did.”
The General hugged the blushing and smiling little Captain of his, and carefully he kissed his cheek.
“You are wonderful, Faramir.” He looked at his oh so yes wonderful brother
“It is late; you must go back to your room and get your rest. I also need rest for tomorrow.”
Boromir walked with Faramir back to his room and made sure he was comfortable before leaving for his own sleep.

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